#crafting_intimacy

Building the Ability to be Vulnerable

High performers are not allowed to be vulnerable.

This is a general statement, but one that impacts our culture AND what level of intimacy we are able to reach within our relationships.

It is a “toxic” masculine idea that usually is talked about with men and boys, but can be true for anyone that is a high achiever, has a high drive, and a particularly strong work ethic.ย 

Itโ€™s the people we depend on.

When who we are is dependable, when we are the providers, when profits dip when we donโ€™t have our hands on the wheel, it can be impossible to express when you are needing something extra, something different, something to help, or someone to lean on – even when itโ€™s just for a moment.

And when, uncharacteristically, a machine of a human being finds themselves in need and vulnerable, how do we help?

๐˜ฟ๐™ค ๐™ฌ๐™š ๐™ฉ๐™š๐™ก๐™ก ๐™ฉ๐™๐™š๐™ข ๐™ฉ๐™ค ๐™œ๐™š๐™ฉ ๐™—๐™–๐™˜๐™  ๐™ช๐™ฅ ๐™–๐™จ ๐™ฆ๐™ช๐™ž๐™˜๐™ ๐™ก๐™ฎ ๐™–๐™จ ๐™ฅ๐™ค๐™จ๐™จ๐™ž๐™—๐™ก๐™š?

๐˜ฟ๐™ค ๐™ฌ๐™š ๐™ฉ๐™š๐™ก๐™ก ๐™ฉ๐™๐™š๐™ข ๐™ฉ๐™๐™–๐™ฉ ๐™ฉ๐™๐™š ๐™ง๐™š๐™–๐™ก๐™ก๐™ฎ ๐™ž๐™ข๐™ฅ๐™ค๐™ง๐™ฉ๐™–๐™ฃ๐™ฉ ๐™ข๐™š๐™š๐™ฉ๐™ž๐™ฃ๐™œ ๐™ž๐™จ ๐™ž๐™ฃ 30 ๐™–๐™ฃ๐™™ ๐™ฌ๐™šโ€™๐™ง๐™š ๐™–๐™ก๐™ก ๐™™๐™š๐™ฅ๐™š๐™ฃ๐™™๐™ž๐™ฃ๐™œ ๐™ค๐™ฃ ๐™ฎ๐™ค๐™ช?

๐˜ฟ๐™ค ๐™ž๐™ข๐™ข๐™š๐™™๐™ž๐™–๐™ฉ๐™š๐™ก๐™ฎ ๐™จ๐™ฉ๐™–๐™ง๐™ฉ ๐™ง๐™š๐™–๐™จ๐™จ๐™ช๐™ง๐™ž๐™ฃ๐™œ ๐™ฉ๐™๐™š๐™ข ๐™–๐™ฃ๐™™ ๐™จ๐™–๐™ฎ, ๐™ค๐™ ๐™ฎ๐™ค๐™ช ๐™˜๐™–๐™ฃ ๐™ข๐™–๐™ ๐™š ๐™ž๐™ฉ ๐™ฉ๐™๐™ง๐™ค๐™ช๐™œ๐™ ๐™ฉ๐™๐™ž๐™จ! ๐™”๐™ค๐™ชโ€™๐™ง๐™š ๐™ฉ๐™๐™š ๐™จ๐™ฉ๐™ง๐™ค๐™ฃ๐™œ๐™š๐™จ๐™ฉ ๐™ฅ๐™š๐™ง๐™จ๐™ค๐™ฃ ๐™„ ๐™ ๐™ฃ๐™ค๐™ฌ ๐Ÿ™‚

It can be difficult to feel held when youโ€™re always doing the holding.ย 

This is why itโ€™s important to develop relationships where those around us can recognize when we are feeling vulnerable and provide the safety, care, and intimacy we all crave.